my 2006 MLB predictions

first of all…HAPPY OPENING DAY! these good wishes extend to everyone, including liberals and democrats, as long as we can all embrace the unifying force that is major league baseball. so let’s start the predictions. feel free to add to my list.

2006 MLB predictions:

  • the cubs will not win the world series.
  • barry bonds will continue not to answer questions about steroids.
  • yankees fans will still be rude and obnoxious to fans of other teams.
  • george steinbrenner will threaten to fire joe torre and brian cashman.
  • the yankees will still win the al east.
  • the red sox will make some excuse why that happened (other than their weak starting pitching).
  • tom glavine will show that the braves still own him.
  • victor zambrano (mets), danny graves(indians), and kris benson(o’s) will completely suck.
  • pedro martinez will miss significant time due to injury.
  • a team other than the mets will win the nl east. 🙁
  • roger clemens will almost hit a batter in the head.
  • all divisions except the nl central will have competitive races for the top spot.

that’s what i think, and i reserve the right to change any of this at any time in the future. for those who were able to get the day off, enjoy all those baseball games. as for me, i’m off to work.

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world series picks

the answer is quite simple: domino’s steak fanatic pizza and the fizzy, carbonated beverage (pop, not soda) of your choice. i can’t recommend an alcoholic beverage, since i don’t drink those. 🙂

as for the actual baseball teams involved, it’s a tough call. i have no rooting interest here. on the one hand, you have the chicago white sox, who haven’t won the WS since 1917, and we all know what happened in 1919 with the black sox. their fans have probably been punished long enough for that. then there’s the astros, who have never been to the WS in their entire history. they also have many players who are very easy to like, both for their baseball ability and for their appealing personalities. i would be ok with either team winning the world series.

my overall good feeling about the astros does not extend to roger clemens. he is without question a hall-of-fame pitcher with eye-popping stats. but he’s a jerk. he’s a headhunter. it’s one thing to brush a guy off the plate. that’s part of baseball. but when you intentionally throw at a guy’s head (as i believe clemens has done), there’s no way to excuse that. he’s also the only pitcher on record to throw a broken bat at an opposing batter (piazza). red sox fans have their own memories of “the rocket”. red sox fans remember ’86, where he allegedly asked out of a playoff game that the sox lost.

the astros are a great story. i just can’t swallow this “clemens as conquering hero” storyline. i honestly don’t know who will win the WS. if i was forced to pick a team, i would go with the astros in 6.

read and enjoy this from one of my favorite baseball writers: espn’s jayson stark.

No Yankees or Red Sox? No problem

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the $200 million meltdown

wow. steinbrenner’s wasted almost as much money as the government has this year. the yanks did take it to five games, and good for them. unfortunately for them, the long world series title drought continues. this is a good thing. yankee dominance makes their fans arrogant and obnoxious, as if they had something to do with all those championships. please. humility is good for yankee fans. it knocks them down a few pegs, and they usually need it. yes, this is a broad generalization and does not apply to all of their fans– just the loud ones and the know-it-alls frequenting usenet.

now the question becomes, whose head will roll for this meltdown? if i had to guess, i would guess cashman. torre will not, and should not, be fired. it’s possible that the boss has stopped caring about fan reaction to whatever he does, but if not, torre’s safe. his record in the bronx speaks for itself. it’s possible that torre will stick it to george and resign. he has nothing else to prove and he would free himself from the boss and his temperamental idiocy.

don’t be stupid, george. don’t fire joe torre.

update: more reaction on the meltdown from

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i hate the red sox.

ok. so i’m not nostradamus. that’s what i get for believing in a deeply flawed baseball team. that’s what i get for making picks with my heart instead of my head. if i’m somewhat bent at the sox being 0-2 down, i can’t imagine what red sox fans are thinking right now. of course, they have recent practice at miraculous comebacks, but i just don’t see it happening this time. then again…what the heck do i know?

there’s nothing surprising happening in the other baseball games, except that i expected a better start out of tim hudson. the bottom line on the remaining AL/NL teams is that it’s hard to say that any of them would end up as MLB’s best team, because none of them are all that great. the only team i could possibly argue for would be the cardinals. other than that, everyone else is painfully average.

it’s rumoured that the NHL has returned to business. good to know that the millionaires have to report to work today. i hope that everybody in the NHL got what they wanted out of the stupid lockout. i’m not a hockey fan…but i did miss espn’s barry melrose and his hair gel.

j.j. abrams and his talented band of writers get to redeem themselves tonight for last week’s alias episode. we shall see if they can. good luck winning back the female fans, guys.

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MLB playoff picks

here’s the promised playoff picks for my small, yet devoted group of readers. if you bet on baseball, like pete rose, you might want to ignore these picks.

here we go.


  • too many questions about the yankees’ pitching outside of randy johnson
  • the yanks’ offense/experience will keep them in this series, but it will not be enough
  • angels in 5

red sox/white sox

  • schilling’s last start was a good one, so maybe he’s figured it out just in time.
  • wakefield scares me, though, as knuckleballers are prone to do.
  • the boston offense can steal a couple wins for the red sox.
  • i picked against boston last year, and they won the whole thing. so, boston in 4.


  • the braves are no different this year from past years, in that they looked impressive in the regular season…rolling up all those victories and NL east crowns.
  • however, i don’t know how their young players will react to performing in the postseason.
  • clemens. pettitte. oswalt. those are three reasons, not even considering the astros’ pen, to pick the astros. this is their year to get out of the first round. astros in 5.


  • the padres could possibly win one game, maybe two, in this series.
  • but the cardinals are too much of a complete team to give that many games away so…
  • cardinals in 4

i take no responsibility for any money lost by following my advice. but if you’re still trying to figure out what kind of pizza to order while watching the games…the choice is obviously the domino’s steak fanatic. you will not be sorry with this choice, trust me. it is one of the most delicious pizzas in the history of pizza.

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yanks/sox and attack pigs

in the spirit of the yanks/sox rivalry this weekend, here are some fun links for your entertainment and enjoyment.

chewbacca’s throwing heat at fenway
Sox fans trash free Yanks caps

from the technology will save the world department:

Remote-controlled rats could save lives
Gas prices high? Try an eco-friendly, $3.5 mil Skycar –neiman marcus does their part for fuel conservation. if you buy any of the suggested items in this article, the capitalists will have won.

stupid human tricks–

Parents sue university for son’s fatal dorm fall–because after all, when you intentionally do something stupid, the consequences are never your fault.
Eviction escape: Man flees, pig attacks— some headlines just write themselves.

other fun links–

rock, paper, scissors–now with 25 gestures. it used to be such a simple game.
Teletubbies In Cocaine Bust–(courtesy of TSG) jerry falwell should have warned us about this.

i’ll be back to some serious stuff on monday. check back then.

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the anti-yankees official FAQ

who are these new york yankees?

the earthly expression of pure evil in the universe. they steal your job, the love of your life, and the best players from YOUR team, and then they break your heart into little tiny pieces. they are owned by a guy who stole his nickname from bruce springsteen, and is also known to red sox fans as “the emperor”. no word yet on whether anakin would join this evil empire. but my spies tell me that yankee GM brian cashman, possibly looking to return from the dark side, has been seen taking meetings with yoda.

why hate the yankees?

  • they are bent on world domination and hostile takeover of baseball, and they kick puppies in their spare time
  • because capitalistic monoliths must be stopped

why does everyone love derek jeter?

it must be because he’s a great shortstop… no, that’s not it. maybe it’s because he always thinks about the good of the team. it must be because he always has one very good month at the end of the baseball season. frankly, there are some mysteries in life that will never be solved.

why hate their fans?

  • because they have the nerve to whine about only winning the WS 26 times.
  • for wearing yankee gear and knowing nothing at all about the team.
  • because it’s the right thing to do.

why do i hate the yankees?

there’s no room to explain it in just one blog post. so i won’t.

enjoy the weekend baseball. if you see the afflecks at fenway, tell ’em i said hello.

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AL playoff-related hostilities this weekend

much can change in a few short days. the a’s are now out of the picture. too bad. i like watching that team. so now we are left with the white sox, indians, red sox, yankees, and angels.

at the beginning of this whole preview, i was ready to put the yankees and red sox both into the playoffs. i couldn’t decide which one was the wild card. i have changed my mind about this.

the boston red sox–you ARE the WEAKEST LINK. goodbye. i love boston’s offense very much. i adore david ortiz as a hitter. what gets it done in the playoffs? pitching. the yankees have been making better use of their pitching staff. they have rivera. he’s pretty good. they also have an offense that’s almost as good as boston’s. i think the yankees have the edge here, and they are going to win the AL east. this is still a series worth keeping an eye on this weekend.

the pitching edge also goes to the indians over boston. their starters have been terrific and they have one of the best bullpens in the AL. that’s more than a significant advantage. i love the way the indians have been playing down the stretch, and while they might not sweep the white sox, i say they win more games than the red sox.

to summarize — the yankees and indians join the angels and white sox in the playoffs. more analysis to come after the matchups are finalized.

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AL playoff contender breakdown (part I)

the contenders — angels, yankees, a’s, indians, white sox, red sox.

l.a. angels (of anaheim)

what i like about them:

  • vlad guerrero, garrett anderson, darin erstad
  • some quality bullpen guys like f-rod, lackey, and donnelly (even though the #s may not be as good this year)
  • more consistent than the a’s
  • they are important to my playoff scenario that excludes the yankees and white sox

what i don’t:

  • their name (little-emphasized fact: los angeles= the angels) so we have = the angels angels if accurately translated from CA’s other native language. can’t we just go back to the CALIFORNIA angels? this makes no sense. the marketing gods were drunk here.
  • their starting pitching…i don’t trust it. bartolo colon used to pitch for the indians. he was pretty good, but he never had that ACE mentality. odds are good he won’t ever get it.


  • starting pitching starting to come around and johnson beginning to earn his money
  • rivera. enough said.
  • scary hitters swinging bats.

(don’t like)

  • bullpen questionable other than rivera
  • their defense
  • derek jeter (overrated)
  • steinbrenner (evil)
  • yankee fans (delusional)

oakland a’s

  • rich harden and huston street
  • future met barry zito. there’s something attractive about a scruffy musician-type with a wicked curveball. he would be a star in NY. just steer the guy away from cashman and the bronx.

(don’t like)

  • inexperienced starting pitching
  • weak bullpen (in my opinion anyway)

look for the second part of the preview later in the week. Go TRIBE!!!!

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ohio state wins again…and other interesting sports events

i hate regional programming with college football games. for some reason, being in south carolina means that games on in my area will rarely include ohio state. someone actually thinks that people here care more about clemson, north carolina, nc state, et. al, than teams up north somewhere. don’t they get that most of us came in here from somewhere else and may not care about those teams? while i’m ranting about things, i would like to slap the person who thought that it would be a brilliant idea to embed an audio/video ad with no mute or stop button in the scoreboard page. ok. rant over.

here’s another reason why XM rules. i actually got to listen to the ohio state game without paying a cent over my plan. the game was actually more dominant for the buckeyes than the final score. the defense was fantastic again. two fumbles in the red zone for the buckeyes prevented a similar shellacking to what usc did against oregon. thanks to wisconsin for defeating michigan.

in saturday’s baseball action —

yankees lose, the yankees lose…and the red sox tie it up in the al east. if i’m a sox fan, my team would make me very nervous. but as i’ve previously pointed out, it is good for the country for the yankees to lose and to miss the playoffs entirely. whatever has to happen for that to take place…i’m in favor of it. well…except for targeted assassinations and kidnapping randy johnson. one has to draw the line somewhere.

the mets win, as if it matters at this point. it’s nice that glavine has started pitching better. i wish he had started this process when it actually meant something. the indians and white sox win also. very impressive collapse in progress by the white sox. if it continues this way, at least they will be spared the embarrassment of imploding in the first round of the playoffs.

the AL has some great races going on right now in all divisions. i’ll write more about that later. i will get to the NL at some point, but the mets are out, so i don’t care quite as much about that.

enjoy the NFL. try not to lose any money or join the fantasy team cult.

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